If you read part one on this topic, you noticed that it was mostly theoretical.
Part two is more practical.
SUMMARY OF PART 1:
1) Fantasy is all mental activity.
2) Reality is what comes through the senses.
3) Use fantasy only for entertainment and brief problem solving.
HOW IT HELPS TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE
Remember a moment of great relief when you knew a nightmare was “only a dream?”
Remember a feeling of great joy when it seemed some dream had “come true?”
As we improve at differentiating between fantasy and reality
we get a lot of these wonderful feelings!
One of the greatest problems we face is “the fear of our fears.”
It is destructive to believe our fears!
Fears are only fantasies about horrors.
Spending time on them is painful, and a waste of energy.
Hope, like fear, is just a fantasy.
But hope feels good!
Never stop enjoying your hope!
OUR “WORLD VIEW” OR “FRAME OF REFERENCE”
Each of us has a unique, completely different idea about how the world works.
Some of us think “love makes the world go ’round,”
others think “everything is about power,”
or money, or trust, or being well liked….
The list is endless.
But the truth is that no one really knows how the world works!
It can be comforting to know we are all wrong,
and yet somehow we all survive
and most of us do it quite well, thank you!
WHAT TO DO AND HOW IT WORKS
Immerse yourself in your fantasies – and in your reality – separately.
When you get good at never confusing the two,
add a little of the fantasy to your reality just for the fun of it!
Improve your sex life by enjoying your fantasies completely,
enjoying real sex intensely,
and occasionally enhancing sexual reality with sexual fantasy.
Improve your career by enjoying your dreams of success completely,
enjoying your daily work as much as you possibly can,
and enhancing daily work with your dreams occasionally.
Improve relationships with children by enjoying your hopes about them,
enjoying their real growth,
and “sprinkling” your hopes into your playtime enjoyment of them.
See how it works?
Any aspect of your life can be improved by immersing yourself in reality and fantasy,
keeping them separate most of the time,
and occasionally “sprinkling” reality with fantasy for the sheer fun of it.
ABOUT MAKING MAJOR DECISIONS
When we need to make major decisions (relationships, career changes, etc.)
fantasy can get in the way.
When faced with important life decisions, do your best to
measure the reality of your situation against what you want.
When deciding about a career move,
measure the guarantees offered to you against the kind of employment situation you want.
While your hope may involve future promotions and other “possibilities”,
you are usually better off making your decision
on what you know for sure about the new situation.
When deciding about a partner,
measure the reality of how they treat you against how you want to be treated.
While your hope may be that they will change,
you are better off making your decision based on
what you have actually observed about them.